Crave

  I'm sitting here eating Carrots. Carrots are good. Carrots are better with ranch! But, Carrots ARE NOT what I want to be eating right now. I want to be eating a juicy burger and fries. Yesterday I made a commitment that starting today (Yep I am one of those, have to restart on a Monday kind of people) I would start eating clean(er). I can't continue living the way that I am living. I can't continue to be overweight. This last statement here is INCREDIBLY HARD. I have a problem. I am addicted to food. God, I really hate looking at that last statement. It is ugly and I have denied it on many levels in the past because its not like I am addicted, like drug addiction....or am I?
   For as long as I can remember I have been obsessed with food. One might not think it because as a kid I was skinny. I mean really really skinny until about halfway through high school when my eating habits caught up with me and I could afford to go buy my own food. My nickname as a kid was "The food police". No joke... I was always worried that there was never going to be enough of the "good stuff." I was always looking forward to my next meal. Still to this day, I give food way too much power. Way too much! I think about it constantly, even healthy food from time to time :) I am always focusing on my next meal, sometimes while I am in the middle of eating a meal. I fantasize about food. And lord, do I crave it. The more I give into the cravings the worse they get!
 I think for me, one of my big coping mechanisms in life is comfort eating. I eat when I am happy. I eat when I am sad. I just LOVE to eat! All my functions revolve around eating.I don't know if I have every really dug deep enough to figure out the base of this, however I am now. I am reading this incredible book by Lysa Terkeurst called " Made to crave". This book is about her struggle with food addiction and how she overcame it by focusing on building her relationship with Christ. This book is really challenging me, because I never thought of it that way. I never really thought about coming to God with this struggle. To pray for strength to abstain from cheese sticks... That struggle is Real folks.
 This verse:

Isaiah 45:2-3

² I will go before you
    and will level the mountains^[a];
I will break down gates of bronze    (The temptation of mounds of chocolate)
    and cut through bars of iron.         ( The desire to eat 10 instead of 1)
³ I will give you hidden treasures,    ( The peace that it is more than just a number)
    riches stored in secret places,       ( The Security that my worth is in you)
so that you may know that I am the Lord,
    the God of Israel, who summons you by name.