Cancer is a gift

OK before you rip me a new one here, bear with me for a minute. I am reading this book "The hardest peace" by Kara Tippets and it is blowing my mind. How I came upon this book was very interesting. Any of you Amazon shoppers know that when you pick out a book it then recommends books based on what other people have bought. I was trying to fill up my Christmas list and saw this book and briefly scanned it and added it to my wish list. Honestly I didn't pay much attention to what it was about. Well I received it for Christmas and the book is about "expecting grace in the midst of life's hard... Kara's personal battle with terminal cancer. Wow! The timing of this was impeccable. Needless to say this book is going to be marked and tattered when I am done with it.
  So, back to my title... I read this line in the book and honestly the first thought in my mind was, and please excuse my language but "fuck that!" How can cancer possibly be a gift? She says this...
" I can say that cancer and suffering give the beautiful gift of perspective. It is the gift you never wanted, the gift wrapped in confusion and brokenness and heartbreak. It's the gift that strips all your other ideas of living from you completely. The beautiful, ugly raising to the surface of the importance of each and every moment."  What a beautiful perspective on a very hard place. I can tell you, from being here now for the second time that terminal illness does just that. It makes you really realize what is the most important thing. To cherish the little moments, the people in your life and the relationships that you have. I know that walking through this again has urged me to become incredibly close with my extended family. Would that of happened otherwise? Maybe not. She urges us to seek grace instead of anger. That "if God has called me to this hard story, his promise is one of sufficient grace. Sufficient for me, sufficient for my family."
   Reflecting on these words makes me really think that in some ways Cancer is a gift. It is not a gift I would ever choose. I wouldn't wish this path on anyone, truly. You know how sometimes you get a gift and you think "What on earth am I going to do with this?" And then somehow it works itself into your life?  A gift in the way that I see the world now. How I interact with people or choose to do my daily life. My perspective is forever changed and I do believe for the better.
This song has really been resonating with me lately.


We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we have faith to believe

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the achings of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise